brene brown on shame
"Vulnerability is our most accurate measurement of courage --- to let ourselves be seen, to be honest."
Vulnerability is not weakness - that myth is profoundly dangerous. Vulnerability is emotional risk, exposure, uncertainty. It fuels our daily lives. It is the birthplace of innovation, creativity, and change. To create is to make something that has never existed before. The ability to adapt to change is all about vulnerability.
Shame is the swampland of the soul.
Shame says, "You will never be good enough. Who do you think you are?"
Shame focuses on the self and says, "I am bad" when guilt focuses on behavior and says, "I did something bad."
For women, shame says, "do it all, do it perfectly, and never let them see you sweat" -- This weaves a web of unattainable, conflicting, competing expectations - the straight jacket of the soul.
For men, shame says, "do not be perceived as weak"
Empathy is the antidote to shame.
Shame grows in secrecy, silence, and judgement.
The two most powerful words in the trenches of a struggle are "Me Too"
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